09/03 Friday (Sabbath): Recall Notice

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Please Read Carefully
Applicable to all models

The Maker of all human beings is recalling all units manufactured, regardless of make or year, due to a serious defect in the primary and central component..................the heart.

This is due to a malfunction in the original prototype units codenamed "Adam" and "Eve", resulting in the reproduction of the same defect in all subsequent units. This defect has been technically termed "Subsequential Internal Non-Morality," or more commonly known as S.I.N., as it is primarily expressed.

Some other symptoms include:

1. Loss of direction
2. Foul vocal emissions
3. Amnesia of origin
4. Lack of peace and joy
5. Selfish or violent behavior
6. Depression or confusion in the mental component
7. Fearfulness
8. Idolatry
9. Rebellion

The Manufacturer, who is neither liable nor at fault for this defect, is providing factory-authorized repair and service free of charge to correct this SIN defect. The Repair Technician, Jesus, has most generously offered to bear the entire burden of the staggering cost of these repairs. There is no additional fee required. The number to call for repair in all areas is: 772937 (P-R-A-Y-E-R).

Once connected, please upload your burden of SIN through the REPENTANCE procedure. Next, download ATONEMENT from the Repair Technician, Jesus, into the heart component. No matter how big or small the SIN defect is, Jesus will replace it with:

1. Love
2. Joy
3. Peace
4. Patience
5. Kindness
6. Goodness
7. Faithfulness
8. Gentleness
9. Self control

Please see the operating manual, the B.I.B.L.E. (Believers' Instructions> Before Leaving Earth) for further details on the use of these fixes.

WARNING: Continuing to operate the human being unit without correction voids any manufacturer warranties, exposing the unit to dangers and problems too numerous to list and will result in the human unit being permanently impounded. DANGER: The human being units not responding to this recall action will have to be scrapped in the furnace. The SIN defect will not be permitted to enter Heaven so as to prevent contamination of that facility.

Thank you for your attention.

GOD

Please assist where possible by notifying others of this important recall notice, and you may contact the Father any time by "kneemail".

(Source unknown) SDA

Responses to this article:

FU CEYI: I think we should be more careful with what we say about God. It appears disrespectful to suggest and compare Him in the first place to an incompetent OEM (Original Equipment Manufacturer). At best it is a poor illustration of His original handiwork. You can't miss Him if you listen to Him with your original Heart, hence Jesus said that in order to go to heaven You must become like Little Children - pure and innocent...

BLOGGER: Thanks, Ceyi. You're not wrong in your defense of God's creatorship; yes, Man was made perfect and is no robot, machine or "equipment". Instead, Man has free agency, and it is this free agency that was and still is being abused. The article does give some the idea that God's a lousy manufacturer. Note though that the Recall Notice mentions a "malfunction" (which in reality is what happened, back in Eden), not a "malmanufacture" or a "manufacturing defect". The Human Being is more than a machine -- it does not and is not required to follow strictly set routines and thought patterns (see how there are different ways to eat your breakfast, or print a banner, or design a car) -- so we must admit that our present fallen condition is due to a malfunction, not a malmanufacture, hence God can't be held guilty for anything. YET, we have Jesus as warranty..how sweet and comforting is that!

PATTI ECKHOFF: (view original) No, I do not beleive that God, 'GAVE', me this (my illness). It has just become, something. . . that I have learned to live with. At times, yes, I do feel sorry for myself.

BUDMAN: (view original) Mental illness is part of the results of the curse from the Fall. It can affect any of us at any time, as we are ALL under the curse. Before I came to Christ, I was depressed almost all of the time. He set me free from that, and gave me a joy and peace that I never knew before. But still, we all must carry a burden. Paul asked God many times to remove the "thorn from his side" but God told him "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." (2 Corinthians 7-10) So Paul said, "Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ's sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong."